Help

[xuwa]

I am a student with F1 visa and I filed application through marriage to my husband, a US born citizen. We are both 24, no children, no previous marriage. We met at the end of 2011 through a mutual friend, and clicked really well. Then everything went well. Our marriage was a quick decision. One day we talked about it and decided we want to spend the rest of our life together to travel around the earth! So we got married April 2012 (4 months after met)! We had a private wedding and didn't tell a lot of people, only close friends knew (We need to be low key because he is not ready to tell his parents yet. This is explained later in this post). Then we went to China (where I'm from) in May 2012 as our honeymoon and his first meeting with my parents. They liked him a lot. I flew with him to his home back in the Mid-west during Thanksgiving 2012 to meet his parents for the first time but he introduced me as girlfriend. All my husband's family live in a state far away from where we are currently living.

This morning We just got back from the first interview and felt exhausted. The officer didn't approve it but gave us a form. It requests evidence to show a valid marital relationship, such as IRS joint tax returns, life/auto insurance policies, mortgages, joint charge accounts, children's birth certificate, notarized affidavits from friends and family, etc.

Here is my impression after the interview. The officer asked some questions to which our answers might not sound satisfyingly convincing to the officer:
* The officer's first question is about the joint account, but my husband didn't remember when we opened it. I interrupted and said the answer which pissed off the officer.
* When the officer asked my husband when and where he lived before we moved in, and where he worked prior to his current job, he can't remember the beginning time point clearly and gave vague answers which might slightly contradict the information on the forms we submitted.
* The officer asked if my husband's parents know about our marriage. My husband said no, and it's true. Actually we haven't told his parents yet. He is still trying to find the right time to tell them because we married 4 months after we met, and his family are traditional and his brother just married the current wife after 5 years dating, so he wants to wait. But my parents know about our marriage. And we have both met each other's parents. I think this point makes the officer doubt us...

At last, he asks what evidence or other joint stuff we have. Before we took out any documents from the folder, he said "Don't. Tell me what you have first, and I'll let you know what you need to take out." We told him we have the following (not too much):

#Joint bank account statement (Opened since we married. What we do with the joint account is to put in around 300 every month as savings for our future use.He just graduated from college, with a low pay job, and I'm still a student though with scholarship, so we are so poor! )
#Joint name car title (The officer asked who bought the car. I told him it's me, bought in 2011, and added my husband's name on it.)
#Joint name car insurance
#Joint name apartment lease (Earlier we told him we've been living there since July 2011)
Receipt for January rent and utilities for the apartment
#Cable bill for the apartment
#Two photos albums with pictures

After listening to us, he didn't ask to look at any of these! He simply gave us a paper and told us to mail in the evidence and kicked us out...

Now I don't know what to do! He seemed skeptical but that's all we have! I don't know what more I can provide. We've been sort of careless regarding taking care of evidence in daily life.

*We don't have joint health insurance, because my husband's is covered by his dad (who works at a large pharmaceutical company) and mine is covered by the student health plan being part of my university scholarship.
*Our phones are not in the same plan so we don't have phone bills (his is with his parent's and mine with friends).
*No life insurance
*No copy of letters addressed to each other (We don't write letters, we only do texting)
*No Christmas card or congratulation card from a third party. As I said, we didn't advertise our marriage at all. His mom sent us Christmas card but we can't find it...

P.S.
Yes our marriage is hasty, but it was never a life decision I regretted. My husband doesn't want us to be in trouble, so he is considering telling his parents now. We live in this very liberal city inside the mountains, being away from our family and past. We just think we're all adults and it's a free country, so everyone has the right to get married with the right person in their preferred way. But does telling his parents help our case at all??

I will be graduating this year with a master's degree.

We don't need a sponsor because I have income from my TA job and our combined income meet the demand.


What do you think of our case? What more can we provide to prove strongly that we are really married? And I understand that his parents not knowing our marriage is a big red flag. Does telling his parents help our case at all??

I am paranoid now, and I am worried that the officer is ready to deny us. I don't have money to hire attorney...
Please feel free to comment! Thanks!!

[aaydrian]

In scam marriages for greencards usually the USC's parents, family and friends don't know about the marriage while the foreigner's family knows what's going on.

My advice is bite the bullet and tell your in laws etc now. Why the hold up? If presently your new family will be upset that you guys are married imagine how pissed they will be in the future to know you deceived them when you 1st met and how long you carried on this lie. If they are as traditional as I think, this lie could lead to your husband's family never accepting even if you tell the truth. Look at the dog crap you guys are currently in yet if you were truthful initially maybe this could have been avoided.

Anyway.

For your RFE you guys need:
1) To shop for insurance policies that are cheap and easy to get out of so after you present it as evidence and you know if you're approved/denied you both can opt out. Each of you must be the others beneficiary.

2) Have your husband file his taxes as married and with your name on said taxes.

3) Do you have anything that shows you both as each other emergency contact? That might work.

4) Get those affidavits from his side of the family. It doesn't have to include them singing praises to your name but they just need to tell the truth.

5) If your husband has any other financial accounts he can add you to then he should do it.


Did the interviewer giive a deadline for responding to your RFE?

[xuwa]

Thanks! I think the emergency contact is something we never thought of.

Yes, RFE need to be sent in 90 days. We went to consult a lawyer two days ago. I asked if we tell his parents at this point, will that help at all? She said "forget about it" and agreed that it is fine not to tell his parents if he is still waiting for the right time. What she suggested us to do is to find as many affidavit letters as possible, and find all kinds of proof of joint assets/ membership etc.. Take pictures of apartment etc. She said she will write a cover letter for us.

[aaydrian]

More specifics are:
1) Memberships as you said from for eg grocery stores/supermarkets.

2) Add each other as authorized users for Credit Cards and store credit cards eg Macy's etc

3) File those taxes (as married filing separately/jointly whichever best applies to your situation). No matter how low paying of a job your husband has. He still has time to file 2012 taxes.

4) Do you have mail that has been received at the address where you said you and your husband live? That should work too.

5) Photos of you and your husband and friends.

6) Copies of IDs showing the same home address.

7) A part from lease in both names rent receipts in both names.


I have some questions.
A) If your marriage was hush hush where are you going to get affidavits from? And if these friends had no idea of the marriage wouldn't the same reasons that disqualified affidavits from your in laws also disqualify those from your friends? Or will those friends only vouch to knowing that you guys were boyfriend/girlfriend? Get affidavits from your side to show that SOMEONE knows about you two marrying.

B) How is taking pictures of your apartment evidence of a marriage? I could go on HGTV.com, pull some pics and say that's inside my house. The pictures you were advised to take would only show a living space and you guys being present while the pictures were being taken. Those photos would not prove that you live together as man and wife, or even live at the pictured apartment at all.

C) How is a lawyer writing a cover letter evidence that your marriage is bonafide? Or is she writing the cover as if you and your husband composed it among yourselves?

I'm not trying to be harsh/negative, I just can't see how some of the things your lawyer suggested would work. Anyway do what you think makes the most sense and will best get your GC approved. Let us know what happens even if it is 10 weeks or 10 months later. Good luck.