My 2 cents
I am clueless as to why and how I landed here on this thread and read all the comments posted... I feet sorry reading some of the horror stories and chuckled at the more pointless posts which did nothing but play the blame game. Anyhow, I feel compelled to write down what I think - mostly about 'white' women being 'easy' and the 'promiscuous Indian men'.
I was born and brought up in a modern, cosmopolitan, urban, middle-class Indian society. My parents are educated and were semi-strict but very liberal when I was growing up. I have a younger sister and she was treated exactly the same way as I was, although, being a boy, I can say that I could get away with many more shenanigans than my sister. Anyhow, I had a very sheltered growing-up. I was never popular in school or amongst peers and had very few friends (we are still friends). Kind of a geek/nerd who never topped in school. All my knowledge about the world came from school textbooks, Discovery and National Geographic. The only English movies I watched were the likes of The karate kid, mortal combat, JAWS etc.
Then when I turned 16 my views of the world changed. I fell into bad company and was introduced to ****ography. That's when I knew how babies were made. When I was with this particular group of friends, I saw many **** movies and hollywood movies. I noticed that most hollywood movies meant for adults had full/partial/frontal nudity. Guys met girls for the first time and made love. None of the **** movies available at that time had Indian actors. And such foreign **** movies were bountiful. Every kid on the block had access to atleast 5 movies at a time. So I learnt from my peers that 'white culture' is very easy going. Its easy to get 'white' people to bed. Be it men or women. And since none of the **** movies had Indian people, it was assumed that Indian girls are not as uninhibited and thus hard to get into bed.
But this view changed too in a couple of months. As I found out, there were scores of girls in my conservative catholic school who had lost their virginity before turning 14. And its true that some Indian men are 'sex-starved' due to societal customs. One reaches sexual maturity by the age of 14 and gets to have sex after marriage at around 24-25 years of age. No wonder, some Indian men are sex crazy. Its like keeping a hungry tiger chained for a week with no food. In traditional, rural Indian societies, most guys and girls get married as soon as they reach legal marriageable age. So, these people are not that sex crazy. In the cities, where there is more pressure and competition, marriage gets delayed by a significant time and hence there is promiscuity amongst young adults who are trying to adopt a 'western' culture portrayed in popular cinema.
Moral of this story: Indian men consider white women 'easy', thanks to the plethora of nudity and sex seen in hollywood movies and **** movies. Indian women can be promiscuous as well. Anyhow, I personally believe that the only way to stop Indian men of thinking of westerners as 'easy' is as simple as not letting them see western **** and any hollywood movie showing nudity and sex should be banned. Ah, wishful thinking.
Moving on....
Topic: Indian men who promise marriage to white women and go on to marry the girl of their parents choice ::::
There are unfortunate stories of this happening. Indian man comes to USA for a job or to study. Finds a white girl and wants to do the same things with her as he saw in the ****o movie while growing up as a kid. Then he faces peer pressure to boast about his sexual exploits to all his friends back home who will worship him and treat him as their idol. So he hatches his master plan. Befriend the girl, coo some lovey-dovey words in her ear, talk about how great their kids will look and then go to bed. All said and done, follow whatever parents have to say and dump the girl. Afterall, she was 'white'.
Well, for starters, this story commonly unfolds in India as well. Guy meets girl, makes false promises and get her into bed. And then leaves her high and dry. And I wouldn't be surprised if this thing happens in other parts of the world, irrespective of color of skin, nationality and religion. Its all too common. The opposite stories exist as well. Woman meets rich and wealthy man, befriends him, proves him how great she is in bed, demands expensive gifts, gets married and then she has access to all his money. Divorce often follows this and the man wonders how he will arrange for the expensive alimony???
Moral of the story: Cheating and promiscuity is rampant in society. Could be anywhere in the world. There is no distinction in class, creed, skin color, race and gender.
**Advice for ALL women: Men, especially Indian men are very skilled in sweet talk. That can be a virtue and also a vice. Especially when dating a person from another culture and nationality, make sure that you are formally introduced to your partners parents, friends, relatives, cousins back from his home country as his better half. If possible, subtly mention your intention of marriage to his family. If you get a positive response from his family, then marriage could be on the cards. If he refuses to introduce you to his family and friends, you should be on the look-out.
Here's what happened some days back:
I live in the midwest now and all my friends are Caucasian. I don't drink alcohol but I do hang out in bars with my friends. So I had this conversation with 2 female friends and a male friend (all Caucasian).
Female friend 1 (FF1): So, you never had a girlfriend? Ever? Why?
Me: I never felt the need to.
FF2: What do you mean? Don't you feel lonely?
Me: I do feel lonely. That's the reason I have you guys. Any anyhow, I am too busy with work to think about a relationship.
FF1: I think you are just opposed to the idea of relationships. Have you ever dated a girl? Asked her out?
Me: No
FF1: That's what we call dating here. You make friends. You ask them out to a date. See if you like each other. And then if things don't work out, its fine. There are other people in this world. Try again.
Me: It does not work for me that way. I cannot do that. Not my game.
FF2: I think you are being too dismissive about this issue.
Me: Not at all. I am very idealistic and if love has to happen, it will happen.
Male friend(MF): Dude, see that girl in white?
Me: Yeah.
MF: She is hot. You should totally get her.
Me: I am too shy. I cannot go up to people and talk about random ****
FF2: Why can't you talk? She is a good looking girl who probably gets hit upon too frequently. All the guys approaching her would be the same. You on the other hand come from a different country, a different back ground and you can tell her stories which no other guy in this bar can tell her.
FF1: And ff we girls introduce you to her, it will be so much easier. She would be more willing to talk to you.
Me: I don't know. I don't think this is a good idea.
MF: I am your wingman. Whenever you like a girl, just let me know.
Me: Yeah. Thanks dude.
Then rest of the group joined us and we left the bar as it was 1:30am.
Parting thoughts: I am not friends anymore with the bad company of friends when I was 16. I have moved on and doing very well in personal and professional life. I am a unattractive, fat, 25 year old, dark Indian male and still a virgin. I am considered a loser by most of the guys in India who know me as I have been in the USA for 3 years and 'not banged a white chick'. I on the other had cannot be more nonchalant. I don't care about jumping into bed with unknown people. If I ever have to get married, I will make sure that I and my partner have mutual interests, both agree to settle in India later on and my parents approve of my choice. My choice of spouse won't be dependent on skin color or virginity. Only then I will move ahead with marriage. My first relationship will be marriage. I am still stuck with the belief that one's best gift to his/her life partner is virginity. I believe it makes the relationship more special and creates more trust. I don't distinguish people based on skin color. I think women look beautiful irrespective of whether they are white, black, brown, yellow, pink, indian, american, japanese, chinese, african, whoever. Its true that women with shapely body, glowing skin and well kept hair will manage to attract attention. I have so much to say about the physics and chemistry about attraction between men and women but I have been typing for about 2 hours now and need to stop.
And I really feel sorry for the above people who got cheated and swindled in relationships. It kinda sucks. I have been through many such broken friendships where I trusted my friends and all they did was leave me in the lurch.
The above post is my personal collection of thoughts and I do not mean to hurt anybody's views and sentiments. You do not have to subscribe to any of my opinions.
Peace out. And Happy July 4th.
I am clueless as to why and how I landed here on this thread and read all the comments posted... I feet sorry reading some of the horror stories and chuckled at the more pointless posts which did nothing but play the blame game. Anyhow, I feel compelled to write down what I think - mostly about 'white' women being 'easy' and the 'promiscuous Indian men'.
I was born and brought up in a modern, cosmopolitan, urban, middle-class Indian society. My parents are educated and were semi-strict but very liberal when I was growing up. I have a younger sister and she was treated exactly the same way as I was, although, being a boy, I can say that I could get away with many more shenanigans than my sister. Anyhow, I had a very sheltered growing-up. I was never popular in school or amongst peers and had very few friends (we are still friends). Kind of a geek/nerd who never topped in school. All my knowledge about the world came from school textbooks, Discovery and National Geographic. The only English movies I watched were the likes of The karate kid, mortal combat, JAWS etc.
Then when I turned 16 my views of the world changed. I fell into bad company and was introduced to ****ography. That's when I knew how babies were made. When I was with this particular group of friends, I saw many **** movies and hollywood movies. I noticed that most hollywood movies meant for adults had full/partial/frontal nudity. Guys met girls for the first time and made love. None of the **** movies available at that time had Indian actors. And such foreign **** movies were bountiful. Every kid on the block had access to atleast 5 movies at a time. So I learnt from my peers that 'white culture' is very easy going. Its easy to get 'white' people to bed. Be it men or women. And since none of the **** movies had Indian people, it was assumed that Indian girls are not as uninhibited and thus hard to get into bed.
But this view changed too in a couple of months. As I found out, there were scores of girls in my conservative catholic school who had lost their virginity before turning 14. And its true that some Indian men are 'sex-starved' due to societal customs. One reaches sexual maturity by the age of 14 and gets to have sex after marriage at around 24-25 years of age. No wonder, some Indian men are sex crazy. Its like keeping a hungry tiger chained for a week with no food. In traditional, rural Indian societies, most guys and girls get married as soon as they reach legal marriageable age. So, these people are not that sex crazy. In the cities, where there is more pressure and competition, marriage gets delayed by a significant time and hence there is promiscuity amongst young adults who are trying to adopt a 'western' culture portrayed in popular cinema.
Moral of this story: Indian men consider white women 'easy', thanks to the plethora of nudity and sex seen in hollywood movies and **** movies. Indian women can be promiscuous as well. Anyhow, I personally believe that the only way to stop Indian men of thinking of westerners as 'easy' is as simple as not letting them see western **** and any hollywood movie showing nudity and sex should be banned. Ah, wishful thinking.
Moving on....
Topic: Indian men who promise marriage to white women and go on to marry the girl of their parents choice ::::
There are unfortunate stories of this happening. Indian man comes to USA for a job or to study. Finds a white girl and wants to do the same things with her as he saw in the ****o movie while growing up as a kid. Then he faces peer pressure to boast about his sexual exploits to all his friends back home who will worship him and treat him as their idol. So he hatches his master plan. Befriend the girl, coo some lovey-dovey words in her ear, talk about how great their kids will look and then go to bed. All said and done, follow whatever parents have to say and dump the girl. Afterall, she was 'white'.
Well, for starters, this story commonly unfolds in India as well. Guy meets girl, makes false promises and get her into bed. And then leaves her high and dry. And I wouldn't be surprised if this thing happens in other parts of the world, irrespective of color of skin, nationality and religion. Its all too common. The opposite stories exist as well. Woman meets rich and wealthy man, befriends him, proves him how great she is in bed, demands expensive gifts, gets married and then she has access to all his money. Divorce often follows this and the man wonders how he will arrange for the expensive alimony???
Moral of the story: Cheating and promiscuity is rampant in society. Could be anywhere in the world. There is no distinction in class, creed, skin color, race and gender.
**Advice for ALL women: Men, especially Indian men are very skilled in sweet talk. That can be a virtue and also a vice. Especially when dating a person from another culture and nationality, make sure that you are formally introduced to your partners parents, friends, relatives, cousins back from his home country as his better half. If possible, subtly mention your intention of marriage to his family. If you get a positive response from his family, then marriage could be on the cards. If he refuses to introduce you to his family and friends, you should be on the look-out.
Here's what happened some days back:
I live in the midwest now and all my friends are Caucasian. I don't drink alcohol but I do hang out in bars with my friends. So I had this conversation with 2 female friends and a male friend (all Caucasian).
Female friend 1 (FF1): So, you never had a girlfriend? Ever? Why?
Me: I never felt the need to.
FF2: What do you mean? Don't you feel lonely?
Me: I do feel lonely. That's the reason I have you guys. Any anyhow, I am too busy with work to think about a relationship.
FF1: I think you are just opposed to the idea of relationships. Have you ever dated a girl? Asked her out?
Me: No
FF1: That's what we call dating here. You make friends. You ask them out to a date. See if you like each other. And then if things don't work out, its fine. There are other people in this world. Try again.
Me: It does not work for me that way. I cannot do that. Not my game.
FF2: I think you are being too dismissive about this issue.
Me: Not at all. I am very idealistic and if love has to happen, it will happen.
Male friend(MF): Dude, see that girl in white?
Me: Yeah.
MF: She is hot. You should totally get her.
Me: I am too shy. I cannot go up to people and talk about random ****
FF2: Why can't you talk? She is a good looking girl who probably gets hit upon too frequently. All the guys approaching her would be the same. You on the other hand come from a different country, a different back ground and you can tell her stories which no other guy in this bar can tell her.
FF1: And ff we girls introduce you to her, it will be so much easier. She would be more willing to talk to you.
Me: I don't know. I don't think this is a good idea.
MF: I am your wingman. Whenever you like a girl, just let me know.
Me: Yeah. Thanks dude.
Then rest of the group joined us and we left the bar as it was 1:30am.
Parting thoughts: I am not friends anymore with the bad company of friends when I was 16. I have moved on and doing very well in personal and professional life. I am a unattractive, fat, 25 year old, dark Indian male and still a virgin. I am considered a loser by most of the guys in India who know me as I have been in the USA for 3 years and 'not banged a white chick'. I on the other had cannot be more nonchalant. I don't care about jumping into bed with unknown people. If I ever have to get married, I will make sure that I and my partner have mutual interests, both agree to settle in India later on and my parents approve of my choice. My choice of spouse won't be dependent on skin color or virginity. Only then I will move ahead with marriage. My first relationship will be marriage. I am still stuck with the belief that one's best gift to his/her life partner is virginity. I believe it makes the relationship more special and creates more trust. I don't distinguish people based on skin color. I think women look beautiful irrespective of whether they are white, black, brown, yellow, pink, indian, american, japanese, chinese, african, whoever. Its true that women with shapely body, glowing skin and well kept hair will manage to attract attention. I have so much to say about the physics and chemistry about attraction between men and women but I have been typing for about 2 hours now and need to stop.
And I really feel sorry for the above people who got cheated and swindled in relationships. It kinda sucks. I have been through many such broken friendships where I trusted my friends and all they did was leave me in the lurch.
The above post is my personal collection of thoughts and I do not mean to hurt anybody's views and sentiments. You do not have to subscribe to any of my opinions.
Peace out. And Happy July 4th.
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