White girls and Indian guys in the USA

[micaelix]

tired of this conversation..

neither all white women look down upon dark skin, nor (hopefully) all men are only thinking about sex, nor women only think about money.

I have always loved Indian culture, starting with my childhood when i used to watch Bollywood movies back in Romania. Having moved here in the States a number of years ago, i feel like Indian culture is in some ways similar to my own. We are family oriented and respectful. I have gone to parties where i was the only non-indian and ended up spending most of my time talking to the elder. I have considered the posibility of innitiating a relationship with a Indian person and the thought of having his parents living with us doesn't bother me. I think a immigrant could understand me and my thinking, my longing sometimes for my country as i feel the are going thru the same

Yet i have experienced this lack of seriosity in the way i was aproached. I find that totally disrespectfull.. not as a white person, but as a human being and as a woman. I always returned the answer.. "i bet you don't say that to an Indian woman".. and i move along as i have learnt that i shouldn't waste my time on people that don't deserve it.

Hope you all begin by being more tolenrant and understanding with eachother or we'll deepen these differences that make so unique untill we'll all end up hating and killing each other.

Namaskar...

[w103snb]

From Black Girl, To Indian Royalty

Whoaaa..Honey that was Strong and True what you wrote. I have recently dated a Indian guy, and I have got nothing but more Respect, ever from any Man! All I have to say is,what you wrote is TRUE and Down To Earth! The Integrity and Moral of your character shows that you Understand against a Fascist World

[vaheed]

defamation of character

Hi All,

You are going to love Indian men for thinking this way!!! Really worth the read...one of the BEST e-mails I've received in a long time!!

It seems that an article was written to a well-founded magazine, by an English woman who requested a response from Indian men. I'm so glad she got what she asked for (and more)!!!

---------------------------------------------------------
Dear Editor:

I'm sorry but I would like to challenge some of your Indian male readers. I am a White female who is engaged to an Indian male, good-looking, educated and loving. I just don't understand a lot of Indian female's attitudes about our relationship. My man decided he wanted me because the pickings amongst Indian women were slim to none. As he said they were either too fat, too loud, too mean, too argumentative, too needy, too materialistic or carrying too much excess baggage. Before I became engaged, whenever I went out I was constantly approached by Indian men, willing to wine and dine me and give me the world If Indian women are so up in arms about us being with their men, why don't they look at themselves and make some changes. I am tired of the dirty looks I get and snide remarks when we're out in public. I would like to hear from some Indian men about why we white women are so appealing and coveted by them. Bryant Gumbel just left his wife of 26 years for one of us. Charles Barkley, Scottie Pippen, the model Tyson Beckford, Montell Williams, Quincy Jones, James Earl Jones, Harry Belafonte, Sydney Poitier, Kofi Anan, Cuba Gooding Jr., Don Cornelius,Berry Gordy, BillyBlanks, Larry Fishburne, Jesley Snipes...I could go on and on.
But,right now, I'm a little angry and that is why I wrote this so hurriedly. Don't be mad with us White women because so many of your men want us.

Get your acts together and learn from us and we may lead you to treat your men better. If I'm wrong, Indian men, let me know.

Disgusted White Girl, Somewhere in VA.
------------------------------------------------------------
The Response:

Dear Editor:

I would like to respond to the letter written by A Disgusted White Girl.

Let me start by saying that I am a 28-year old Indian man. I studied from one of the most prestigious universities in Atlanta, Georgia with a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Business Management. I have a good job at a major corporation and have recently purchased a house. So, I consider myself to be among the ranks of successful Non-White men. I will not use my precious time to slander white people. I just want to set the record straight of why Indian men date white women.

Back in the day, one of the biggest reasons why Indian men dated white women was because they were considered easy. The Indian girls in my neighborhood were raised traditionally. They were very strict about when they lost their virginity and who they lost it to. Because of our impatience to wait, brothers would look for someone who would give it up easy without too much hassle. So, they turned to the white girls. Nowadays, in my opinion, a lot of Indian males date white women because they are docile and easy to control. A lot of Indian men, because of insecurities, fears, and overall weaknesses, have become intimidated by the strength of our Indian women. We are afraid that our woman will be more successful than us, make more money than us, drive nicer cars and own bigger houses. Because of this fear, many Indian men look for a more docile woman. Someone we can control. I have talked to numerous Indian men and they continuously comment on how easy it is to control and walk over their white women.

I just want to set the record straight. I want A Disgusted White Girl to know that not all successful Indian men date white women. Non-Whites like Ahmad Rashad, Denzel Washington, Michael Jordan, Morris Chestnut,Will Smith, Blair Underwood, Kenneth 'Babyface' Edmonds, Samuel L. Jackson, and Chris Rock all married strong Non-White women. And, to flip the script, there are numerous white men, in and out of the spot light, who openly or secretly desire Non-White women over white women. Ted Danson, Robert DeNiro, and David Bowie to name a few. I just don't want the 'Disgusted White Girl' to be misinformed.

Stop thinking that because you are white that you are some type of goddess. Remember, when Non-White Egyptian Queens like Hatsepshut and Nitorcris were ruling Dynasties and armies of men in Egypt, you were over in the caves of Europe eating raw meat and beating each other over the head with clubs. Read your history! It was the Non-White woman that taught you how to cook and season your food. It was the Non-White woman that taught you how to raise your children. It was Non-White women who were breastfeeding and raising your babies during slavery. It is the Non-White woman that had to endure watching their fathers, husbands, and children beaten, killed, and thrown in jail.

Indian women were born with two strikes against them: being Non-White and being a woman. And, through all this, Still They Rise!

It is because of the Indian women's strength, elegance, power, love and beauty that I could never date anyone except my Indian Queen. It is not just the outer beauty that captivates and draws me to them. It is not the fact that they come in all shapes, sizes, colours and shades that I love them. Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing about Indian women. Their strong spirit, loving and nurturing souls, their integrity, their ability to overcome great obstacles, their willingness to stand for what they believe in, and their determination to succeed and reach their highest potential while enduring great pain and suffering is why I have fallen in love with Indian women.

I honestly believe that your anger is geared more toward jealousy and envy than snotty looks. If this were not so, then why do you continuously go to tanning salons to darken your skin. If you are so proud to be white, then why don't you just be happy with your pale skin? Why do you continue to inject your lips, hips, and breasts with unnatural and dangerous substances so you can look fuller and more voluptuous? I think that your anger is really a result of you wanting to have what the Non-White woman has.

BOTTOM LINE: If I were looking for a docile woman, someone I can walk over and control, I would give you a call. But, unfortunately, I am looking for a Virtuous Woman. Someone that can be a good wife and mother to my children. Someone who can be my best friend and understand my struggles. I am looking for a soul mate and; unfortunately, you do not and CANNOT fit the bill.

No offense taken, none given.

Signed,
Indian Royalty.

To Disgusted White Girl

I dont know where you get off speaking for ALL white women who are in relationships with Indian men! PLEASE dont stick me in your catagory. You claim your smart fiancee doesnt know any good indian women??? That they are all too fat, argumentitive, loud, etc etc.. Sounds like hes feeding you a bunch of bullshit to shut you up!! My husband tells me that there is absolutely nothing wrong with the indian women. We are all pretty much the same when it comes to emotional needs & wants and most women want the same thing....unconditional love, respect, honesty, loyalty, etc etc.. There are fat, skinny, loud, stupid white women too!! White women need to start emmulating the indian woman for her self respect, loyalty, & self reliance. Im actually a tad jealous of them for that. White women are no more special than any other. If you are attractive and confident a man doesnt care what your race or ethnicity is!

To the guy who belittles the white women,

White women are docile & easy to control??? Really??? I'm sure if a man searches for someone like that they will find one no matter what ethnicity! American women are mostly raised to be self assured & powerful. American women are in the military more than any other country. We have more leaders & have a rediculous amount of more responsibilty than any other due to this!! We have more fighters, athletes,doctors, fire fighters, police, politicians than any other country. Do you still want me to go on??!! Are they easy to control or would be docile?? So if an American woman wants to have no strings attached sex just like you do, is not considered easy in my book. American women wanted to be treated as equals which we have battled for decades & are tired of being called easy cause of it. ALL WOMEN INCLUDING INDIAN WOMEN are strong, hard working, beautiful human beings & are no better than any other ethniciy. Just because you only know of a few and base your theories on that are just dumb!!

And not all indian men are love gods!!! Indian men LOVE LOVE TO GOSSIP!! I have never been with a man that loves to gossip this much! A lot of indian men marry in India & then come to America to work and send $$ back to their family. They will do this for years! Thier kids grow up with no father around and speak to his kids via web cam! They cheat on thier spouses due to the fact theyve been away for so long! I don't believe the idiotic excuse about not finding any work in their own country. The economy in India is soaring but they still come here to work & stay for years leaving thier family behind!! My husband has several friends that do this. Some Indian men are very secretive & very much to themselves. They love making $$$ & working. Sometimes I think they love $$ more than their wives or kids. Even their arranged marriages are one big $$$ transaction. Forcing thier kids to marry a stranger for a little bit of land, gold, and cash. There is no honor in this. My point is that there is no race or ethnicty that is perfect. We all have our faults. Stop matching one to the other.

[lorim]

Bravo Barbie!! I am in a similar situation and agree...

To those on here that are outsiders and not totally aware of what it is truly like to date an Indian gentlemen as a caucasian (use the politically correct term, we're now past white and brown) woman. I recently became engaged to my dream husband, and he is Indian. His family is originally from India, however he has never lived there. He lost his virginity to surprise an INDIAN girl. He tried over and over to please his parents by dating Indian women. He turned to the "lighter side" to caucasian women for a few reasons. 1. Indian women are in his words "unattractive" 2. Indian women are far to bossy 3. Indian women think they are "entitled" to a lifestyle without having to work for it and 4. Indian women want to marry an Indian guy because they have been told this is what you must do since birth. His parents told him that if he was to marry a "white" girl they would disown him. What are their reasons??? "A white girl won't take good care of us like an Indian girl would." Although it may be tradition in INDIA for the in-laws to move in to the home...we are in America now. If you keep up with that attitude Indian parents, you are most certainly not going to be taken care of. A good "Indian" wife has nothing better to do in her day than drive around in her Toyota and take care of the in-laws. A good caucasian daughter will be graduating from graduate school, earning and living in a career, and taking care of the husband and children...not being run all over like a "good" Indian wife. I do not expect to travel to India, live there, and have all of India adapt to my beliefs, therefore those minorities coming here late in life should learn that America is not going to drop and start believing such as they do. Feeling like Americans should adapt to them is very ethnocentric and irrational. America is a country of freedom where you can date, have sex with, or marry whomever you please without repercussions. It is far too irrational to hate your future daughter-in-law whom you have never met based on her skin color...we have a word for that here in America, it's call RACISM. There are many of my future husband's Indian friends whom date white girls but are forced to marry Indian girls by their parents. News to you, men will do what they want, family influence or not. My fiance asked me to marry him anyway, without family approval. He is a man, not a boy and will marry and have children and a life that he wants, not what his parents want. After all, he is the one that has to live through the life, not his parents. So again, why do Indian men not want Indian women...I think it is because they grow up to be this bossy old bitter no hobby Indian wife that has nothing better to do than boss around their children and interfere in their lives...just because it was done to them. Good luck to those men who decide to live the life your parents wished for you. Hope doing what mommy and daddy says at the age of 35 makes you happy. Grow up, be a man, and do what YOU want. You're in America now...it's allowed.
No offense, and none taken-
-Barbie

I agree with just about everything here...grow up already, Indian men, stop acting like little boys, your parents wont be around forever, so live YOUR LIFE, not theirs!! Stop being afraid to feel love for an American woman. PEOPLE ARE PEOPLE...and this race, class, CASTE stuff HAS TO STOP!! Are we in the ice ages or what, caste????!!!! And you know very well, we love you just as deeply, if not more, since we have CHOSEN YOU, not been forced together, and would be faithful and take care of you as well if not better than an Indian woman/wife. Get OVER IT, AND WAKE UP!!

[lorim]

You have got to be kidding me??

its pathetic to read the white woman's opinions on why indian men date or marry or whatever ... White women. Your man must have fallen in love with you for who you are. But that does not mean that all indian men are like your man. If only you heard the things indian men talk about white women, you would know that most use you only for the momentary physical part.
For long term relationships and family, indian men prefer indian women.
Indian women on the streets may give you the looks not because they are jealous-remember there are half a billion of them in this world-so no competition. They give you looks because the only thought going through their mind is that you two are sleeping around -its rather a dirty look they are giving you and please do not mistake it for jealousy.
I cannot but laugh at your comments that indian women are not preferred because they are fat, loud mean etc. Haven't you seen majority of white women that are obese, loud, mean with no moral values-who sleep with any man at the drop of a hat. Common -get real.
Your man may have have told you these as his reasons for choosing you because he knows you have an inflatable ego, need it boosted like this at the cost of slandering indian women so that you won't sleep with another guy that you meet round the corner. You white women are too easy.

Good luck sister and remember that the world looks at you white women as nothing more than physical objects.

disgusting racism...how sad. Proud to be a non racist american...and i feel sorry for your shallow, ignorant minded self...

[smadhavan]

Ok, after seeing this thread I've came up with another question.

Why do Indians consider themselves as white?
All of my Indian friends deny their race as Asians and call themselves Americans just because they were born here.
They go around and make fun of other Asian's dialects and physical appearances.
One of my friend really thinks that others consider him as "white", and he likes it that way.

Why is this so? Are American Indians embarrased to be Indians?
If I was an Indian and I go up to someone else, his/her first impression of me would be that I am Indian and not a white American.

This concept is very prevalent among the Koreans as well.

Just my thoughts on this subject

Although the indian subcon is geographically classified as under asia, indians are racially different from other asians ( chinese, jap etc). And i do not think indians consider themselves as white. India is multi-racial ,so much so that they can be mistaken for any race on this planet. Me and my friends ( when i was in LA) , some of us mistaken for mexicans , some latinos, some europeans , arabs , iranians etc.. Some of my tamil friends have been mistaken for kenyans / africans and north east indians are mongloids.

Consider that the indian americans ( born and brought up here ) who are un-sucessfull at something like dating, ultimately start blaming their race / parents for their lack of success. They tend to start picking on FOBS who are below them ( in looks/abilities ) and all this can become pretty ugly.

Include negative sterotyping of indians, like poverty, slums, hygiene etc etc, and some indian americans can be pretty hostile to their own culture and race.

But I would think that this is true for allmost all non-white immigrants.

[rayb]

As a famous man once said: "Why can't we all just get along?"

--Ray B

Just my thoughts on this subject

Although the indian subcon is geographically classified as under asia, indians are racially different from other asians ( chinese, jap etc). And i do not think indians consider themselves as white. India is multi-racial ,so much so that they can be mistaken for any race on this planet. Me and my friends ( when i was in LA) , some of us mistaken for mexicans , some latinos, some europeans , arabs , iranians etc.. Some of my tamil friends have been mistaken for kenyans / africans and north east indians are mongloids.

Consider that the indian americans ( born and brought up here ) who are un-sucessfull at something like dating, ultimately start blaming their race / parents for their lack of success. They tend to start picking on FOBS who are below them ( in looks/abilities ) and all this can become pretty ugly.

Include negative sterotyping of indians, like poverty, slums, hygiene etc etc, and some indian americans can be pretty hostile to their own culture and race.

But I would think that this is true for allmost all non-white immigrants.

[Lility]

do not stereotype us!

Thats a short answer for the mad white woman and for the well confident king indian guy.
well i do not agree with both of u guys in some terms. Frist of all who am I? I am a brazilian woman and very white one, that u could see all my veins tru my skin and also married to an indian guy and so i feel i can say that u guys are not only mistaken but being very racist as well.
That some indian guys like white skin? what's the big deal on it! im white and id rather not marry a white guy becoz i do not feel attracted to them (if the matter was the skin color only) and thats has nothing about racism only personal preferences that all of us naturally have, so i see no problem with that and for sure i love my indian husband skin.
second thing and now for my dear india guy here. DO NOT STEREOTYPE US WOMEN! where did u read that all of us are 'easy ones'. Only because maybe u've seem some F*** B*** somewhere do not assume that all of us are that way! btw do not talk about something u do not know. Yes we white women may be docil, but that doesn't mean weakness and im sure id not have problem in kicking some guy's **** if he doesn't treat me well no matter what race he is! Also i really think that u are so lost in ur words... Love has nothing to do with how the ppl looks like or cultural matters!!! u're obviouslly having a very poor understanding of what love is! Love has much more to do with like staying and talking with the person, companionship, comprehension and thats just has nothing to do with where the person came from or races dont be that stupid!
Yes i must agree indian women are very strong ones, arent them? but that doesn't mean all the rest of us women arent! you don't know and ur understanding about us seems to be very limited. We cannot be stereotyped. All women are strong some in different manner maybe due the culture or whatever but we all are strong and wonderfull as indian women are.
and also you guys DO NOT STEREOTYPE INDIANS GUYS! how the **** u think all of then share the same stupid oppinion as some indian guys here!! do not assume that all indian guys are kinda poor thinking like some guys here! and if a indian guy take a white woman only for fun thats his problem, maybe shes doing the same aswell or maybe hes too bastard to full a woman and i must say that in this case the problem is not with us white women but with some stupid indian guys!

[jd71593]

Docile- NOT!

"Dear Editor:

I would like to respond to the letter written by A Disgusted White Girl.

Let me start by saying that I am a 28-year old Indian man. I studied from one of the most prestigious universities in Atlanta, Georgia with a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Business Management. I have a good job at a major corporation and have recently purchased a house. So, I consider myself to be among the ranks of successful Non-White men. I will not use my precious time to slander white people. I just want to set the record straight of why Indian men date white women.

Back in the day, one of the biggest reasons why Indian men dated white women was because they were considered easy. The Indian girls in my neighborhood were raised traditionally. They were very strict about when they lost their virginity and who they lost it to. Because of our impatience to wait, brothers would look for someone who would give it up easy without too much hassle. So, they turned to the white girls. Nowadays, in my opinion, a lot of Indian males date white women because they are docile and easy to control. A lot of Indian men, because of insecurities, fears, and overall weaknesses, have become intimidated by the strength of our Indian women. We are afraid that our woman will be more successful than us, make more money than us, drive nicer cars and own bigger houses. Because of this fear, many Indian men look for a more docile woman. Someone we can control. I have talked to numerous Indian men and they continuously comment on how easy it is to control and walk over their white women.

I just want to set the record straight. I want A Disgusted White Girl to know that not all successful Indian men date white women. Non-Whites like Ahmad Rashad, Denzel Washington, Michael Jordan, Morris Chestnut,Will Smith, Blair Underwood, Kenneth 'Babyface' Edmonds, Samuel L. Jackson, and Chris Rock all married strong Non-White women. And, to flip the script, there are numerous white men, in and out of the spot light, who openly or secretly desire Non-White women over white women. Ted Danson, Robert DeNiro, and David Bowie to name a few. I just don't want the 'Disgusted White Girl' to be misinformed.

Stop thinking that because you are white that you are some type of goddess. Remember, when Non-White Egyptian Queens like Hatsepshut and Nitorcris were ruling Dynasties and armies of men in Egypt, you were over in the caves of Europe eating raw meat and beating each other over the head with clubs. Read your history! It was the Non-White woman that taught you how to cook and season your food. It was the Non-White woman that taught you how to raise your children. It was Non-White women who were breastfeeding and raising your babies during slavery. It is the Non-White woman that had to endure watching their fathers, husbands, and children beaten, killed, and thrown in jail.

Indian women were born with two strikes against them: being Non-White and being a woman. And, through all this, Still They Rise!

It is because of the Indian women's strength, elegance, power, love and beauty that I could never date anyone except my Indian Queen. It is not just the outer beauty that captivates and draws me to them. It is not the fact that they come in all shapes, sizes, colours and shades that I love them. Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing about Indian women. Their strong spirit, loving and nurturing souls, their integrity, their ability to overcome great obstacles, their willingness to stand for what they believe in, and their determination to succeed and reach their highest potential while enduring great pain and suffering is why I have fallen in love with Indian women.

I honestly believe that your anger is geared more toward jealousy and envy than snotty looks. If this were not so, then why do you continuously go to tanning salons to darken your skin. If you are so proud to be white, then why don't you just be happy with your pale skin? Why do you continue to inject your lips, hips, and breasts with unnatural and dangerous substances so you can look fuller and more voluptuous? I think that your anger is really a result of you wanting to have what the Non-White woman has.

BOTTOM LINE: If I were looking for a docile woman, someone I can walk over and control, I would give you a call. But, unfortunately, I am looking for a Virtuous Woman. Someone that can be a good wife and mother to my children. Someone who can be my best friend and understand my struggles. I am looking for a soul mate and; unfortunately, you do not and CANNOT fit the bill.

No offense taken, none given.

Signed,
Indian Royalty."

Indian Royalty,

I am a young white girl and I know an Indian guy who I like A LOT. (Also, we are still in high school.) We both go to a great school that has advanced courses which we take, and that is where I met him. I would like to think of us as equals because we are both very smart, athletic, and accomplished for people our age.

I do not think that I am "easy" because I am white. I am proud to say I am a virgin and do intend to stay that way until I am married. Many girls I know are just the same. I would not just "give it up easy" because some guy asked me to. I have more self-respect than that! I am not docile! Easy to control? Really? If that is what you have to say you have never met a white girl around where I live. If anything, guys are easy to control. (Well, not this guy, but you get my point) Of course Indian girls can be successful! My two best friends are Indian girls and they will be extremely successful! They will probably make more money than you, or drive a nicer car, definitely own a better house! Women are moving up in this world and that is a GOOD thing that sexist people like yourself should have accepted of by now. No man will ever be able to control me! I don't care how absolutely amazing he may be- I will not be restrained! I will not be walked over!

I do not agree with either A Disgusted White Girl, or you "Indian Royalty." Who said white women think we are goddesses? Hasn't anyone ever taught you not to assume things? Yeah well try this saying on for size. "It makes an *** out of U and ME!" Just because we are white doesn't mean we are less than you. Don't point out how our ancestors lived because NEWS FLASH! I was not alive at the same time period as Hatsepshut and Nitorcris- and NEITHER WERE YOU! If you want to compare us, compare us not our ancestors. And white women are very capable of raising their own children! My mother raised my sisters and I without any help from any man because he was weak enough to LEAVE. She did not get any help from anyone. The white part of my family wasn't even here during slave times- the Native American part was. Are you implying that white women live the perfect lives because if you are, you may want to ask your oh-so-prestigious Universities for a refund!

If you think being white makes things easier for me- then that just tells me how racist you are! Don't go around assuming things!! How many times must I say this! You are like a child!! And I AM a child saying this! I would "Respect my elders," and all, but respect is earned and you have not earned anything but disgust!

I am strong! I may be elegant when I so please! I will be powerful one day- just you wait and see! I am going to do things you couldn't imagine! I would like to say I am very loving as I have many younger siblings I care for dearly and I love to be with young children in my free time! I will go out of my way to help someone any day! Am I not beautiful because I am white? Well let me tell you this- I mentioned before my two best friends are Indian- their parents came here and they were born in America, and they are completely Indian. Are you comprehending so far? I have nearly the same skin color as one of these girls! What does that say?! America is a very diverse place. We are a melting pot of SO many cultures! If this wasn't true I would not be here. There is more diversity in American people than in any other place I have EVER BEEN! Even if my unnamed crush does not feel for me how I do for him (Oh and you know how much I hope he does!!) - it is his own loss because despite what you believe; I am strong, nurturing (in most circumstances- not this one of course,) I have integrity, I am determined and driven, and I have been through a lot so far in my life! You wouldn't know because you don't know me!

I am not jealous of Indian women. I show no envy! I pity the women in your life! Tanning happens when you are outdoors. Being outside tans you! It is a fact of life! Guys are attracted to active women who spend a lot of time in the sun! Lazy women go to tan to suggest they spend time in the sun not to try to be like someone else because they are ashamed of being white. It hurts for you to imply that. Plastic surgery is not something done only by white women. People in America care deeply for their appearance and it is a personal choice to go about any body-altering things. I would not touch a piece of makeup to my face- forget lipo!

If I were looking for a sexist, rude, stupid, (not to mention old) guy- I would give you a call. But thanks- I'll stick with my (VERY) cute, athletic, ingenious, caring, guy who is my equal. Wish me luck with him everybody- and if it does not work out- I sincerely hope I never meet a guy like this one!

Remember- We are all equal in this world!

[mlsroofing]

Think again

See, our race distinguishing us. Why do care about white girls? We are getting too much closer to them. They think we are still slave to them. Why not avoid them.

[rayb]

Misroofing,

Your message is a little confusing, but it seems that you are suggesting such relationships are not good. Inevitably, mixing of people from different countries and races is what happens with migrations. Most such mixed relationships seem to happen when these people meet and socialize in schools and work locations, and the results are rich and varied.

--Ray B

See, our race distinguishing us. Why do care about white girls? We are getting too much closer to them. They think we are still slave to them. Why not avoid them.

[Hmm Interesting]

Ref: Whilte Girls ... Indian Guys ( Accidental Discovery of this post )

The frustrated or angry White girl

I am writing to you to share with you that there are all kinds of people in all cultures. So the negative comments that you are reading from the bitter Indians towards what you said is just a reflection of those people and that sort of lack mentality.

So if you are married to an indian guy, please dont worry about these people with limited or no exposure to anything except their on lacking mentality... not worth it.

In my book you are fantastic, and do know that a lot of these people who might have given you dirty looks are just just bitter small minded people who dont really have the understanding or the self esteem ( for a lack of better word and I think you know what I mean ). India is a very big country with very huge differences between people. So do be aware that it means nothing and I agree with you that some folks should improve themselves but that's not a concept certain types of indian people might understand. ( certain types )

However there are lots of fantastic Indian guys lots n lots n lots of them

Cheers
Another Indian Guy who lived in india as a little kid

S

[rayb]

Good response to the "angry White girl."

--Ray B

The frustrated or angry White girl

I am writing to you to share with you that there are all kinds of people in all cultures. So the negative comments that you are reading from the bitter Indians towards what you said is just a reflection of those people and that sort of lack mentality.

So if you are married to an indian guy, please dont worry about these people with limited or no exposure to anything except their on lacking mentality... not worth it.

In my book you are fantastic, and do know that a lot of these people who might have given you dirty looks are just just bitter small minded people who dont really have the understanding or the self esteem ( for a lack of better word and I think you know what I mean ). India is a very big country with very huge differences between people. So do be aware that it means nothing and I agree with you that some folks should improve themselves but that's not a concept certain types of indian people might understand. ( certain types )

However there are lots of fantastic Indian guys lots n lots n lots of them

Cheers
Another Indian Guy who lived in india as a little kid

S

[richguy]

Hi All,

You are going to love Indian men for thinking this way!!! Really worth the read...one of the BEST e-mails I've received in a long time!!

It seems that an article was written to a well-founded magazine, by an English woman who requested a response from Indian men. I'm so glad she got what she asked for (and more)!!!

---------------------------------------------------------
Dear Editor:

I'm sorry but I would like to challenge some of your Indian male readers. I am a White female who is engaged to an Indian male, good-looking, educated and loving. I just don't understand a lot of Indian female's attitudes about our relationship. My man decided he wanted me because the pickings amongst Indian women were slim to none. As he said they were either too fat, too loud, too mean, too argumentative, too needy, too materialistic or carrying too much excess baggage. Before I became engaged, whenever I went out I was constantly approached by Indian men, willing to wine and dine me and give me the world If Indian women are so up in arms about us being with their men, why don't they look at themselves and make some changes. I am tired of the dirty looks I get and snide remarks when we're out in public. I would like to hear from some Indian men about why we white women are so appealing and coveted by them. Bryant Gumbel just left his wife of 26 years for one of us. Charles Barkley, Scottie Pippen, the model Tyson Beckford, Montell Williams, Quincy Jones, James Earl Jones, Harry Belafonte, Sydney Poitier, Kofi Anan, Cuba Gooding Jr., Don Cornelius,Berry Gordy, BillyBlanks, Larry Fishburne, Jesley Snipes...I could go on and on.
But,right now, I'm a little angry and that is why I wrote this so hurriedly. Don't be mad with us White women because so many of your men want us.

Get your acts together and learn from us and we may lead you to treat your men better. If I'm wrong, Indian men, let me know.

Disgusted White Girl, Somewhere in VA.
------------------------------------------------------------
The Response:

Dear Editor:

I would like to respond to the letter written by A Disgusted White Girl.

Let me start by saying that I am a 28-year old Indian man. I studied from one of the most prestigious universities in Atlanta, Georgia with a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Business Management. I have a good job at a major corporation and have recently purchased a house. So, I consider myself to be among the ranks of successful Non-White men. I will not use my precious time to slander white people. I just want to set the record straight of why Indian men date white women.

Back in the day, one of the biggest reasons why Indian men dated white women was because they were considered easy. The Indian girls in my neighborhood were raised traditionally. They were very strict about when they lost their virginity and who they lost it to. Because of our impatience to wait, brothers would look for someone who would give it up easy without too much hassle. So, they turned to the white girls. Nowadays, in my opinion, a lot of Indian males date white women because they are docile and easy to control. A lot of Indian men, because of insecurities, fears, and overall weaknesses, have become intimidated by the strength of our Indian women. We are afraid that our woman will be more successful than us, make more money than us, drive nicer cars and own bigger houses. Because of this fear, many Indian men look for a more docile woman. Someone we can control. I have talked to numerous Indian men and they continuously comment on how easy it is to control and walk over their white women.

I just want to set the record straight. I want A Disgusted White Girl to know that not all successful Indian men date white women. Non-Whites like Ahmad Rashad, Denzel Washington, Michael Jordan, Morris Chestnut,Will Smith, Blair Underwood, Kenneth 'Babyface' Edmonds, Samuel L. Jackson, and Chris Rock all married strong Non-White women. And, to flip the script, there are numerous white men, in and out of the spot light, who openly or secretly desire Non-White women over white women. Ted Danson, Robert DeNiro, and David Bowie to name a few. I just don't want the 'Disgusted White Girl' to be misinformed.

Stop thinking that because you are white that you are some type of goddess. Remember, when Non-White Egyptian Queens like Hatsepshut and Nitorcris were ruling Dynasties and armies of men in Egypt, you were over in the caves of Europe eating raw meat and beating each other over the head with clubs. Read your history! It was the Non-White woman that taught you how to cook and season your food. It was the Non-White woman that taught you how to raise your children. It was Non-White women who were breastfeeding and raising your babies during slavery. It is the Non-White woman that had to endure watching their fathers, husbands, and children beaten, killed, and thrown in jail.

Indian women were born with two strikes against them: being Non-White and being a woman. And, through all this, Still They Rise!

It is because of the Indian women's strength, elegance, power, love and beauty that I could never date anyone except my Indian Queen. It is not just the outer beauty that captivates and draws me to them. It is not the fact that they come in all shapes, sizes, colours and shades that I love them. Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing about Indian women. Their strong spirit, loving and nurturing souls, their integrity, their ability to overcome great obstacles, their willingness to stand for what they believe in, and their determination to succeed and reach their highest potential while enduring great pain and suffering is why I have fallen in love with Indian women.

I honestly believe that your anger is geared more toward jealousy and envy than snotty looks. If this were not so, then why do you continuously go to tanning salons to darken your skin. If you are so proud to be white, then why don't you just be happy with your pale skin? Why do you continue to inject your lips, hips, and breasts with unnatural and dangerous substances so you can look fuller and more voluptuous? I think that your anger is really a result of you wanting to have what the Non-White woman has.

BOTTOM LINE: If I were looking for a docile woman, someone I can walk over and control, I would give you a call. But, unfortunately, I am looking for a Virtuous Woman. Someone that can be a good wife and mother to my children. Someone who can be my best friend and understand my struggles. I am looking for a soul mate and; unfortunately, you do not and CANNOT fit the bill.

No offense taken, none given.

Signed,
Indian Royalty.

This guy Indian Royalty is living in fools paradise as he is writing..

It is because of the Indian women's strength, elegance, power, love and beauty that I could never date anyone except my Indian Queen. It is not just the outer beauty that captivates and draws me to them. It is not the fact that they come in all shapes, sizes, colours and shades that I love them. Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing about Indian women...

He has to remain married for a while to understand what a "real" indian woman is! the worst a woman can be!!

Being (not by choice) an Indian and married (painfully for 12 yrs) to an Indian woman, I will never recommend any man to get married to any Indian woman.

[sm15]

bingo

-------------------

I was in India for 17 days in March, and had a DELIGHTFUL time despite the fact that I could not walk 5 feet without my boyfriend at the time (we are both Americans) escorting me, and even then we were mobbed by hundreds of beggars and locals who were so curious about our light skin. I am blonde and honestly I am a very good-looking woman. My ex-boyfriend unfortunately was (and still is) an alcoholic and was extremely verbally abusive to me throughout the trip. He would frequently fight with me in public and in front of our driver. Our driver throughout the trip was a very sweet and I thought, very noble fellow ... 35 years old and funny, interesting, and sensitive. Can you see where this is leading ... ? After 5 days and my intense need to be rescued/saved from my evil ex-boyfriend, I developed a powerful crush on our driver, although I figured it would lead nowhere.

The Indian people are so rude and hateful to the drivers and people they consider (or who are) lower class/caste. At a hotel in Jaipur, the owner (a rich land-owner's wife) was shocked that I even asked where the driver would sleep, since they did not have a room for him. She really could not care less about this person's well-being. The driver told us he sometimes sleeps outdoors if he has no money, and the rooms he does get are filthy and roach-infested. He is not allowed to go into any hotels and many restaurants, and most people treat him like garbage. AND he is stuck with 3 kids and since they do not know anything about birth control (he is from a small farming community near Agra), he is afraid to go home and get his wife pregnant again. He stated clearly that there is "no love in arranged marriage," and said that he did not even see his wife's face until the second day of the wedding ceremony!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOO, my heart went out to him even more. Look at the two of us, trampled down by society!!

On top of that, he seemed to have an aura of spiritual grace and took us to many temples and often went to do pujas on his own. This really was the kicker for me. In any case, I could tell he was getting very attached to us, somewhat unhealthily so. I figured he was very lonely and isolated b/c of his position in society, which he clearly was not happy about, and his prolonged absences from his home and family. The other thing is that his damn Western tourist guests had introduced him to alcohol 3 years ago, and he was bugging my ex-boyfriend to drink with him all the time. My ex-boyfriend did drink with him twice, outside in the hotel parking lot, and I once shared a cigarette and a whisky with them -- which totally shocked (and probably turned him on).

Anyway, long story short, he continued to call us periodically after our return, telling us he missed us and asking us to come back and visit India. I broke up with my ex 12 weeks ago this Sunday. About 3 weeks after the breakup, the driver found out about the breakup from my ex, at which time he called me at 3 am to tell me he always liked me, and asked me to come to India and have sex with him!! I was totally shocked and said "why don't you find a girlfriend in India; I am not a prostitute! (Which is what they all think; I asked him about this in India and he said all the drivers do think that, and he did too until he met nice Western guests).

ANOTHER long story short, I have been periodically lonely and bit messed up, detoxing from my toxic ex-boyfriend, so I ended up calling the driver back and telling him I loved him, and asking him if he loved me too or if he just wanted to have sex with me b/c I am a white woman. He said he has never talked openly about sex ever before with a woman and never slept with anyone besides his wife. But he continued to press me quite aggressively to decide whether I would sleep with him (just once, he insisted!!) and to pull passive-aggressive tactics on me; i.e. saying I lied to him, I broke his heart, nobody understands him, he was forced into arranged marriage, women always play games with men and break their hearts, yada yada yada. Really I feel he was taking advantage of my vulnerability when I was in a very precarious spot. SO THEN I end up booking a ticket for next May with my air miles and promising to give him $2,000 to buy a car! His life-long dream. FINALLY I come to my senses at this point, start freaking out, and text message him and tell him the relationship is over; he is married and clearly an alcoholic; I will not cheat on his wife with him; there will be no $2,000 coming from me, and I am probably not coming to India unless I come with a boyfriend/husband to escort me. He got pissed at me but I stuck to my guns. I recently met a new guy (white American, 35 years old) and texted my Indian friend to tell him, and to say I could not call him for a long while, since my phone bill was around $400! So out of control this whole situation was. He just texted me back this morning to say "why play the game" which PISSED me off ... since he was the one playing the passive-aggressive, male domination game. What an *******. I am very disappointed b/c I am DYING to go to Valley of Flowers in the Himalayas, but it looks like I will need to wait, and definitely find another driver. I am also sad b/c "why can't we all just get along" and be friends, but as our driver was fond of saying, "this is Kali Yug" that we are in -- meaning a dark, evil time in human civilization, and true friends and noble husbands/boyfriends are hard to come by.

IN ANY CASE TAKE CARE ALL OF YOU LOVELY PEOPLE! And let's please STOP focusing on race. I am SO TIRED of being a fetish for dark-skinned men b/c I have blonde hair. Even my ex-boyfriend was obsessed with race and ethnic purity b/c he grew up on the border of Mexico and his parents are French/Spanish, and of some undetermined Mexican origin. This white skinned thing is a HUGE problem in Latin America as well, and caused my ex untold amounts of grief and self-hatred. I grew up in the good ol Midwest where most everyone is white and I have never encountered such racial hangups until I started spending time with non-white people.

WHOA mam don't ever do that again. Looks like he got kind sexually obsessed. If he was a good driver he would never ask money he would be happy with his job or even if he had asked for cash he would do for his family. Enjoy the Himalayas not the driver if you want your safety. You already heard some drivers have been a worst experience for female tourist.

To me its good to learn good things from each other cultures..yeah sometimes people aren't like we expect but there are good people too. So if east and west learn from each other there would be definitely good outcomes of it apart from dissing each other and this discrimination of white and non white thing. My girlfriend is white and shes too good to be true shes conservative respects everyone a bit like Indian and also cheerful girl.. Unfortunately this good girl has aneurysm and health issues which sometimes make her feel depress. But i make her happy and will try my best for her.
I respect both Indian or Non Indian women and all those people who really work hard.
Thats all
Thankyou Namaste Godspeed